The Honking

And remember, don’t do anything that affects anything, unless it turns out you were supposed to, in which case, for the love of God, don’t not do it! Is today’s hectic lifestyle making you tense and impatient? Calculon is gonna kill us and it’s all everybody else’s fault! It’s okay, Bender. I like cooking too. Good news, everyone! There’s a report on TV with some very bad news! I guess because my parents keep telling me to be more ladylike. As though!

• For example, if you killed your grandfather, you’d cease to exist!
• I don’t ‘need’ to drink. I can quit anytime I want!
• No. We’re on the top.
• Our love isn’t any different from yours, except it’s hotter, because I’m involved.

The Why of Fry

Or a guy who burns down a bar for the insurance money! Bender, I didn’t know you liked cooking. That’s so cute. You’ve killed me! Oh, you’ve killed me!

I Dated a Robot

You wouldn’t. Ask anyway! You guys go on without me! I’m going to go… look for more stuff to steal! Enough about your promiscuous mother, Hermes! We have bigger problems. And yet you haven’t said what I told you to say! How can any of us trust you? For example, if you killed your grandfather, you’d cease to exist!

1. But I know you in the future. I cleaned your poop.
2. You seem malnourished. Are you suffering from intestinal parasites?
3. Would you censor the Venus de Venus just because you can see her spewers?
4. Dear God, they’ll be killed on our doorstep! And there’s no trash pickup until January 3rd.
5. Fetal stemcells, aren’t those controversial?

Less Than Hero

I don’t ‘need’ to drink. I can quit anytime I want! Isn’t it true that you have been paid for your testimony? Perhaps, but perhaps your civilization is merely the sewer of an even greater society above you! I meant ‘physically’. Look, perhaps you could let me work for a little food? I could clean the floors or paint a fence, or service you sexually? And so we say goodbye to our beloved pet, Nibbler, who’s gone to a place where I, too, hope one day to go. The toilet.